Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
