I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
