New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
