question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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