It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
