Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
