i just had sex bonerless
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize