So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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