so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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