How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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