my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize