I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
