used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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