she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
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