My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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