Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
