TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
