How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Randomize
