check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
