It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
