im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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