Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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