i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
