sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Verdict: uncircumcised.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
