If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize