If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
