I only kidnapped one of them. chill
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
