Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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