Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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