if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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