great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
