His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
