I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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