Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
