if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize