as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
