Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
