I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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