Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
