I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
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