dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
