Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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