The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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