literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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