Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
