I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
