Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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