that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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