hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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