I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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