TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
