I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The adults are the big ones right?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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