No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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